STRANGE BUT TRUE

The Absurdity of Life

"Tis [It's] strange but true;

for truth is always strange.

Stranger than fiction."              Lord Byron

• The Show Must Go On

Shirley, Massachusetts

At a maximum security state prision,

Gordon Benjamin III was granted parole

but decided to remain behind the bars

for another two months to appear at Sir Lancelot 

in an innate production of Camelot.

The cast had already lost four King Arthurs,

two Merlins, and one Squire Dap

before opening night because prisioners 

playing these roles were transferred.

•  Pushed for Time

Cleveland, Ohio.

A man entered the Union Bank

and demanded that a teller open the vault.

When she explained that tha vault

would not open because it worked on a timer,

he demanded the keys of all the tellers.

Then he changed his mind and ran.

After he stood pushing the front door

of the bank for several seconds,

someone yelled "Pull!" and he escaped.

• Man Escapes 24-Hour Chair Horror

Evansville, Indiana.

Police rescued Raymond O'Neal, fifty eight,

from a reclining chair, where he had fallen

face-first and been stuck for at least 

twenty-four hours, according to his neighbors.

They heard yells from O'Neal's duplex

but were unable to get him answer 

the door or telephone, so they called the police,

who figured he fell and became trapped

when his arm lodged in the chair.

"His head was right about where the headrest is."

Patrolman Tom Pfender said.

"His forearm and wrist were in between

the cushion and armrest."

O'Neal didn't recall how he got stuck.

• Burglar Cleans Up

Gilroy, California.

Police say that a burglar entered an apartmente

and proceded to make the bed, throw out the garbage,

wash the dishes, stack newspapers, and put away

an ironing board and dirty clothes.

The only thing taken from the apartment

was a set of drapes, but the burglar

replaced them by hanging a new set of curtains.

The victim find a five page note saying in part,

"Dear Sir, I hope you don't mind.

I cleaned your house.  Don't worry.

I won't take anything because my father

is a Duke in Spain.  Don't worry.

I'll clean your house for as long

as you live here," signed "Prince Eddie".